Cunchanter

Author: Dr Roger Gibson

Score: 2 / 5

The members of a community of Trappist monks are normally bound by their vows of silence never to speak, except to say prayers, make confessions, and other acts of religious observance.

Once a year, however, they are allowed to chant a greeting to the abbot in plainsong. Each monk may improvise the melody of his chant and protract it to whatever length he wishes.

At breakfast, at 6 a.m. the first monk stands up and chants:

G o o d m o r n i n g B r o t h e r A b b o t.

The performance lasts nine minutes.

The Abbot now stands and makes a response of nearly as long as he sings:

G o o d m o r n i n g B r o t h e r B a r n a b a s.

By 9 a.m. the last monk to chant, Brother Zaccariah, arises and sings the erroneous greeting:

G o o d e v e n i n g B r o t h e r A b b o t.

As soon as he ceases all the other monks break out into the joyous chant:

S o m e c u n t c h a n t e d ‘e v e n i n g’*

*To the tune of Some Enchanted Evening

This joke was written and presented by Dr Roger Gibson of Abbey Wood, London.

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